The Dooryard

Small-town politics douse fireworks

The Harwich Cranberry Harvest Festival is the highlight of the year for my hometown on Cape Cod. When I was a kid, it was the biggest week of the year. It had everything from a beach party to a huge parade to fireworks to a giant fair, complete with ferris wheel and more arts and crafts than Martha Stewart's Connecticut estate.

The festival revolves around, you guessed it, the harvesting of cranberries. About this time every year, cranberry growers across Southeastern New England flood their cranberry bogs and harvest the tart red berries. Harwich has many bogs, some of which supply Ocean Spray.

This year, though, the festival will be void of fireworks. That's because the town water department sent a threatening letter to the town board of selectmen saying that the fireworks contain a water comanimant, perchlorate, and that, IF it's detected in the ground water, it could cost millions. What the water department (of which my old cross-country coach, Don Bates, is the commissioner) didn't ask beforehand was whether the fireworks company could make fireworks without perchlorate, which they can. Now, the company refuses to make the fireworks, saying they don't want to get sued.

And I wonder why my parents wanted to leave that town so badly.

Love me some soul food

I love soul food. I was introduced to it in Los Angeles when I worked at Disney. My boss in the movie department at Disney - a rather large stereotypical New Yorker named Carol - loved Angel Lena's Sould Food Kitchen, and she got me hooked. We'd go there or to Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles in Hollywood for lunch; and when we got back to the office we'd sit in her car for a half hour with the A/C blasting and our feet up on the dash board, trying to digest the food.

Well, I've found a soul food place in Manhattan that would do Carol proud - Maroon's. I went there about a year ago and just went back tonight with Dan. I had the stuffed and smothered pork chop - unbelievable. Plus, I just feel so completely comfortable there; I always feel more comfortable around black people than I do white people. I don't know why.

If you go, check your diet at the door. There's tons of butter and cream in everything I've ever had there, but you can probably avoid some of that by ordering the fried food. Boy is it worth it.

All hail Howard!

Howard Stern might be the most entertaining person in all media. I've been listening to the King of All Media for about 10 years now. Almost every show I've ever tuned into is funny. I don't know why. It's just him and a couple of his buddies talking to stutterers, strippers and drug addicts, ripping on celebrities, and asking guests if they take it up the butt. And it's hysterical. When Dan and I go on long road trips, we now get to listen to Howard from New York City all the way to Rehoboth Beach or the tip of Cape Cod, and we can't get enough of him.

Sirius Radio has actually made his show better. I thought that it might get worse because part of the fun of the terrestrial radio show was what he couldn't say. Now, his creativity has no boundaries and he is putting out the best radio shows he's ever done.

I also love how they'll say anything. There's no political correctness: racist, sexist, homophobic and religious-insensitive comments fly around the room. Coming out of anyone else's mouth, it might sound terrible; but, because of the atmosphere of the show and the fun, positive attitudes of the regulars, it works. I don't get the feeling for a second that any of them are racist or homophobic. And that gives them a license to say whatever the hell they want.

I also subscribed to Howard TV in Demand. Again, great. Seeing old shows like William Shattner's visit to the Homo Room and Latoya Jackson breaking up with her husband is just classic. And they've got daily and weekly highlights, extras of staff members off the air. It's just great and so worth the $13.95 it's costing me.

Can you imagine if the GOP did this?

Can you imagine if the GOP ever did this? The Democrat party in Alabama has invalidated the primary victory of an openly gay candidate for the Alabama Legislature because she and her opponent failed to adhere to a party rule that no one has obeyed since 1988.

It is apropos that this should come the day after I posted about the Democrat party being no friend of gay people. The national Republican Party isn't either, to be sure. But anyone with the illusion that the Democrats are these great champions of gay rights will hopefully get a wake-up call this morning.

If the Republicans did this, you'd have virtually every major newscaster on television, virtually every gay blog, and virtually every newspaper editorial staff crucifying the GOP for being unAmerican and homophobic. Because it was the Democrats, though, there will be some polite disgust, but nothing major.

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

My sister sent me this tonight - so funny and so true. I can't stand #6. I've stopped asking people, "can I ask you a question." Instead, I just ask the question. Revolutionary, huh?

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

Long-time migraine sufferer

It's been almost 10 years since I had my first migraine. In my experience, they're one of the most misunderstood, most mysterious ailments you could have. No one - doctors, scientists, laymen - can tell you what triggers them or where they come from. Personally, I have thought mine come from, at any point over those 10 years, caffeine, dehydration, barometric pressure changes, stress, tightened muscles, and tannins. But, what triggers them in each person is little better than an educated guess.

I had my most recent migraine on Tuesday, very ill-timed just 30 minutes before I was heading to Opera in the Park in Central Park. I went but had to leave an hour before the performance started because a second migraine came quickly and I was feeling nauseas and exhausted.

Before I quit drinking any caffeine in early 2001, I was getting a migraine about once a month. After I quit, they slowed to about once every three or four months. Lately though, in the last six months, I've been getting them every four to six weeks again, which is simply way too often.

There is so much many non-sufferers don't understand about migraines. First is just how debilitating they are. The pain is bad enough, but they can affect eyesight (I temporarily lose some of my vision), make you tired (I get completely exhausted for 12-24 hours after one hits), make you nauseas, delirious. They become all-consuming in a way I have not experienced other pain. You can't just "get over it" or ignore it.

Another key misunderstanding is when they come. People can try to blame migraine sufferers for not taking care of themselves, not getting enough sleep, drinking too much alcohol. But these are most likely not triggers (though, with the latter, it could be a trigger if you're drinking wine). Sufferers of migraines come in all shapes, sizes and lifestyles. People who operate on four hours of sleep, do tons of drugs and eat terribly avoid them while others who are rested and eat nutritional meals, avoiding drugs and alcohol, are plagued by them. Monica Seles is one of the most well-known migraine sufferers.

Finally, there is no cure. There are some medicines that seem to mask the pain or can stop some of the pain from starting. I've only found Advil Migraine to have a good effect.
I'll be writing more about migraines - and the most recent articles and research on them. While other medical conditions get all of the donations and funding, I'm hoping that more people will become aware of this debilitating condition and will help more with their hearts and their pocketbooks.

Will Bob Casey really support us? We may find out

A friend of mine asked me to be on the host committee for a New York event for Senate candidate Bob Casey (left) of Pennsylvania. He's trying to unseat Rick Santorum. And I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Casey says he's pro-gay marriage, but you just can't believe anyone - Democrat or Republican - who says that anymore. When you have Senators like Chuck Schumer and Barbara Boxer opposing gay marriage (by the way, there were no protests at their Fire Island event), how can you trust a candidate like Casey, who's anti-abortion?

Now comes news from Alabama that the Democrat party is dragging its feet in acknowledging the primary victory of openly gay Patricia Todd; and they may actually block her win.

While we continue to make incredible social strides in this country, and while we continue to win rights in many states, we gays are a political hot potato. The conservative Republicans oppose some of our rights because they think they'll galvanize their base by doing so; the Democrats oppose some of our rights because they think that gay people will continue vote for and donate to them whether they support gay rights or not.

The Empire State Pride Agenda here in New York has been great - and ahead of the curve when it comes to bipartisan gay politics - in endorsing candidates that truly support us. Unfortunately, other groups like the HRC (I'm loathe to call them by their longer name anymore) are still just puppets of the Democrat party.

Only when gay people stop blindly supporting the Democrats will we actually have real support from them. And when we start supporting en masse Republicans who are our friends, then maybe we'll start to see more support coming from them, too.

As for the Casey-Santorum race, I can certainly understand why so many gay people are supporting Casey. Santorum is vehemently opposed to gay marriage and other gay rights; Casey claims he supports gay marriage. HRC has made Casey their biggest recipient of financial contributions. My point in bringing up that race is, don't just blindly believe that Casey will be some champion of our rights if he's in the Senate. In all likelihood, he'll end up opposing gay marriage just like so many of his Democrat colleagues. In this race, just as the 2004 Presidential race, I'll happily stand on the sides and watch.

Santorum loss would be crushing blow to social conservatives. (RedState.com)
More about Bob Casey. (BobCasey.com)

Good Things: White Chocolate M&M's

My friend Karl told me about the then- in- the- works white chocolate m&m's about two years ago. So, it was with great excitement that I found them in a store about six weeks ago. They're called "pirate pearls," and they're a special promotion for Disney's "Pirates of the Caribbean."

While Dan was a much bigger fan of the dark chocolate m&m's that came and went with Revenge of the Sith, the white chocolate version is more my speed. I've always loved white chocolate, ever since my mom bought me my first solid white chocolate easter bunny so many moons ago. Plus, I do get a kick out of the little cartoons on the candies that use the "m" in various pirate paraphernalia.

I virtually never eat candy anymore, but I find myself eating a bag of these after dinner once every other week or so, and popping a few in my mouth whenever I get a hankering for something sweet. Unfortunately, I know this is just a limited-time special edition; I'll have to hit Wal-mart and buy up a truckload of them before they're gone.

I'm sorry, Patsy Ramsey!

I know probably most of America was surprised to wake up this morning to news that the prime suspect in the murder of JonBenet Ramsey has been arrested - and it isn't her father. Some creepy-looking guy named John Mark Karr hasn't just been arrested, but he's admitting that he kidnapped and "accidentally" killed the six-year-old beauty queen.

Shame on all of us. For 10 years, the media has led the public (and the public has willfully been misled) to believe that the parents of JonBenet were the murderers. Hour-long TV specials have been devoted to proving the theory that it was her parents who did in the young girl. And now we find out that it is another man - a deranged fan - who is admitting, 10 years later, the he killed the girl.

Why is it that we all feel the need to blame someone immediately once something bad has happened? Why did our culture have to put these parents, who are now likely innocent of the accusations, through 10 years of hell? JonBenet's mother, Patsy, died of cancer earlier this year; and we didn't get the chance to say we were sorry.

My human side wants to blame the disgusting mass media for the public lynching of the Ramsey parents. That's probably well-placed blame. However, like I said, we all love to blame people. While this may enlighten us a little in the future, we'll keep doing it, just with a little more hesitance.

An investigative look at the JonBenet Ramsey case before this revelation.

The tonsils are staying

For the last four days I've been dealing with a parting gift from three weeks of running around Chicago and Montreal getting no sleep: a whopper of a cold. It started early Sunday morning as a tickle in my throat, then became a severe sore throat, then transformed Sunday night into congestion the likes of which I can't remember experiencing before. I get a sore throat and a cold about five or six times a year, and I've gotten tired of it.

On Monday I went to the doctor to ask him about getting my tonsils removed. I've long thought they were the culprits.

"Don't you dare get those removed," he said. The way he said it, it was almost like he had a crush on them or something, like he admired them. Anyhow, he said they were very small as it is ("In fact, it almost looks like they've been removed already"), and they aren't the reason I've been getting sick. It seems I've been exhausting myself in spurts over the last 10 years, which he was absolutely right about. I'll just get going for a week or two, exercising a ton, not eating enough and not getting enough sleep, and then I wonder why I get sick.

So here's my challenge to myself for the next few months: Don't get sick. I'm going to eat right, exercise right, and get at least six hours of sleep EVERY NIGHT, aiming for eight. Hopefully this will last.