The Dooryard

Consider me a crack(berry)head

My phone died about six weeks ago and I made my first foray into the world of Blackberry. I thought I wouldn't like it - figuring it would be clunky and too much information. Boy was I wrong. The Blackberry 7105t, which I have through T-Mobile, really is a great device. It's not much bigger than my old phone, has a very workable keypad, and does just about every function I could want.

Though I keep the thing at my side all the time, I still don't answer it while hanging out with someone, I don't talk on it while interacting with a cashier, and I shut it off during every meal. Though I may love my Crackberry, I haven't loss my manners.

Upcoming photographer in NYC

I wanted to give a little plug for a good guy who's offered his services to the New York Gay Football League this past year, and who has been a big supporter of what we've done there. Carlos Monroy works at Genre magazine but is making a name for himself as a photographer. He has some beautiful stuff from men to still lifes (lives?). I've been really happy with every photo he's taken of me. Check out his site - it's good stuff. There are also a couple more photos after the jump.

"Time to make the donuts"

Who's Michael Vale? You probably don't know him by his given name, but by his signature line; he's the "time to make the donuts" guy from those trademark Dunkin Donuts ads. And he has passed away at the age of 83. I mumble those words to Dan just about every day we wake up together. It's funny - I never really gave much thought to the guy in his pjs and slippers who made it so popular. I'll say a prayer for him when next I do.

Signs are not good for Brokeback Mountain so far this weekend. On Friday, it pulled in an estimated $745,000. Despite being in 148 more theaters, that is $20,000 less than last Friday. While many gays have been hoping for a monumental number at the end of the gay cowboy movie's run, this number, if it is reflected throughout the rest of the weekend, puts it at a much lower trajectory well below the $75 million adjusted that In & Out pulled in.

Fire the bums

The Transit Workers Union here in New York City went on strike as of 12:01am today. The strike has shut down the subways and buses in the middle of the busiest shopping time of the year. It also happens to be very cold out there, with temperatures in the 30s and dipping into the 20s.

These people should be ashamed of themselves. They are on an illegal strike so that they can get some guaranteed raises in the years ahead. I don't have guaranteed raises. My father, who works for himself, doesn't have a guaranteed raise. I hope the MTA does pursue fining each and every one of the workers two days pay for every one day they are on strike. And Roger Toussaint, the ring leader, should be brought up on charges.

These people are public servants, and they are of the worst kind. Except for the post office, I have never observed a group of public servants who collectively are as lazy, nasty and have bad attitudes as much as this group. They get paid $47,000 a year minimum for chewing gum and copping an attitude. Sounds to me like they need to get a pay decrease, not a raise.

If I was Governor George Pataki, I'd take a lesson from Ronald Reagan's dealing with the air-traffic controllers union and fire every one of these bums who refuses to go to work. Screw 'em. Fire every single one. I don't care if the transit system is shut down for two months before new people are hired. And besides, enough of these workers will cross and come back to work in spite of the union. But, if they don't want to work, it's time to give them a permanent holiday.

How much will Brokeback make?

Editors at the Southern Voice and Washington Blade have struck up a bet as to how much money Brokeback Mountain will make. Matt Hennie of Southern Voice says the movie will perform well under hopes due to the ho-hum attitude of straight people; Kevin Naff of Washington Blade has said the Golden Globe nominations and impending Oscar nominations will balloon the film's final box office numbers. They have picked $75 million as the measuring stick as to who is right.

Lots of people are expecting MONSTER numbers out of Brokeback Mountain because of the incredible per-theater average ($109,485) in its first weekend. A number that the biggest of movies hope for is $20,000. But, that BBM number is a bit of a lie. It opened in only five theaters; most movies with the marketing and press exposure that BBM has gotten open in over 3,000 theaters. The way over-inflated the BBM numbers opening weekend.

I don't know if people will stay away because it's a gay movie or if they'll stay away because it's too long and slow. The market is flooded now with quality films that don't have two guys kissing, which have a strong storyline or which have $200 million of explosions.

A good comparison for how this movie will do is The English Patient. Before it won the Best Picture Oscar, it had made $63 million; after it won, it made another $15 million. If Naff is going to win his bet, BBM is going to need to win the Best Picture Oscar; and even then, it will be a tough mountain to climb.

King Kong: What Brokeback could have been

If you had told me I'd see an incredible love story in the theaters this month, I'd have bet it would have involved two gay cowboys. Instead, last night I was emotionally moved by the love affair of a 25-foot ape and a blonde chick.

As long as you can get through the slow-paced first 45 minutes of the movie, the next two hours of King Kong are complete payoff. It's emotional, it's funny and it is action-packed like no other movie you'll see this holiday season.

The portrayal of Kong himself is masterful. When we first meet him, he is a ruthless beast; but we quickly see that this giant monster has all the heart and emotions we have. Upon meeting the blonde objet of his affection, he's confused and scared. When he loses her, he is beside himself with sadness and rage. He is jealous. He is hurt. And, of course, in the end, 'twas beauty that killed the beast.

What is particularly extraordinary about Kong and this relationship are the emotions of Ann Darrow (played by Naomi Watts). Despite Adrien Brody playing the love interest, it is the 25-foot ape that Darrow falls in love with. I felt the emotion and energy between the two. Their relationship came across the screen as beautiful and true. I felt for this beast and this woman what I had hoped to feel for Brokeback's gay cowboys. While Ang Lee is getting all the buzz, it is Peter Jackson who should be preparing to take home yet another Oscar.

FINAL ANALYSIS: From the relationship between woman and beast to the incredible special effects, this movie is one of the best I saw this year. 9 out of 10

Ford is back

Just a couple weeks after announcing they would no longer advertise in gay publications, Ford has reversed its decision. This is big, people. Religious Right groups had convinced Ford to pull all of its gay advertising by targeting and boycotting local Ford dealers and having them bring the complaints to Ford corporate.

Gay groups have convinced Ford to reverse its decision, and this is a BIG deal, people. We have had a complete inability to work and act as a group for a long time. Maybe ever. This win is only the first step, though. We individually need to back up Ford's decision to support us by buying their products; and, if we can't, buying their stock.

Commercial Closet's Mike Wilke sent an email today that included this quote from Joe Lyman, with Ford's human resources:"It is my hope that this will remove any ambiguity about Ford's desireto advertise to all important audiences and put this particular issue behind us," Laymon said. Let's make them proud, business-wise, of their decision.

Did it take bravery?

I enjoyed this column on Advocate.com by Charles Karel Bouley II about the notion that it took courage and bravery for Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal to play gay characters in Brokeback Mountain. To me, there's no bravery in acting in front of a camera. Maybe if they did their own stunts. Maybe if Ledger wrestled that bear as it made a bee-line for craft services. Maybe if Gyllenhaal came out at the premiere. Those things might be called brave. But playing a character in a movie that you could see from 100 miles away would be labelled "Oscar-caliber" before it even began shooting? I don't think so.

Courage and bravery, to me, should be left to define the acts and lives of people like Martin Luther King, soldiers who put their lives on the line, the firemen who went up the World Trade Center as it came down. Those people are brave. But an actor? For playing a role? Eh, I don't buy it.

Pretty funny cartoon I got in my email today: White Trash Christmas